Ashley’s Big Toe vs. A Marinara Sauce Jar



Michael heard a frightening scream and loud crying from the kitchen.


He was instantly hit with an intense fear. The kind of fear that stops your heart. Makes you hyper alert. The kind you only feel when you’re worried for your life.


Or for the life of someone you love.


Michael ran into the kitchen. Ashley was bent over crying. Our son Mason was sitting on the kitchen counter looking frightened.


Ashely was crying to hard she couldn’t utter more than a word.


Michael now in full protective father and husband mode grabbed Mason and helped Ashley sit down on the couch.


After MANY deep breaths everyone was calm. Although Ashley had a big toe the size of Nashville and color of the sunshine raisins.


Turns out Ashley was cooking our favorite pasta and marinara dinner.


Our son Mason was “helping” mama cook by sitting on the kitchen counter.


While cooking, Mason accidently knocked a huge glass jar of tomato sauce off the counter top and onto Ashley’s foot.


It brought a world of pain down on Ashley’s foot like she never experienced before.


Ashley was in pain. Mason felt bad for hurting mama.


This is the kind of situation we all experience.


You get hurt. Feel pain. Something goes wrong.


You look to see WHO you can blame.


There’s a problem though.


When you look around there really is no one to blame.


In our Marinara jar versus Ashley’s toe scenario there is no one to blame.


Mason isn’t to blame. It was an accident. He didn’t intentionally throw the jar at Ashley’s foot.


This brings up an important life factor. The ability to take responsibility for your choices without blaming yourself or others. But that’s a story for another day.


Ashley isn’t to blame either. There is nothing she did that directly led to her toe throbbing in pain.


She can’t blame the jar of marinara sauce. It was just sitting there innocently the whole time 🙂


So what does she do?


What do you do in your life?


When it comes to finding lasting love, you are going to get hurt along the way.


You’ll experience pain at times.


You’ll cry and feel like giving up.


You’ll look for someone to blame for your pain. For your broken heart.


You might blame your current lover. An ex lover. All men. All women.


Worst of all you might blame yourself. You might mentally beat yourself up for days, weeks, months or even years.


But life isn’t that simple. Usually there is no one to blame.


You aren’t to blame. Your lover isn’t to blame. Your ex lovers aren’t to blame. Your parents aren’t to blame.


If you are dead set on blaming someone for your pain you could be stuck there forever. You’ll get jaded. You might even become a major complainypants.


Blame almost never helps any situation. Especially when it comes to matters of the heart.


The next time you get hurt. Feel pain. Don’t get what you want from your lover.


Drop the blame. Take responsibility for your choices. Have compassion for your lover, your ex’s and especially yourself.


If you want to master the dating world and find love once and for all, check out our Meet Your Mr. Right Course


Say Yes to Love,


Dr. Michael Arn & Dr. Ashley Arn


P.S. Ashley’s toe ended up being broken right under the toe nail(ouch). The doctor said it might be black and blue for months. She’s a trooper though. We made sure not to blame Mason. Now mama’s wearing a cool boot.