The Biggest Lie of Matchmaking

“I’m looking for a guy who is a cross between Shemar Moore and Jayson Taylor and I won’t settle for anything less”.

When we worked as matchmakers at eHarmony, one of our clients told us the above statement.

She wanted us to find her a guy who looked like a cross between these two VERY GOOD LOOKING men.

Shemar Moore even dated Halle Berry at one point.  These guys are extremely attractive celebrities and professional athletes.

Go to google to see what these guys look like if you don’t already know…

We tried to persuade our client to focus less on the superficial but to no avail.

We told our client that these men were very attractive and sought after and that if she really wanted to find a guy like this she would need to change a number of things about the way she showed up in dating to attract these types of men.

She was shocked and offended that we would offer such feedback.

She didn’t need to do anything differently.   She didn’t need to change anything about her appearance, how she communicated or how she showed up on her dates.

Her ONLY problem was that she wasn’t MEETING the right men.  She wasn’t coming across these types of hot and successful guys.

and therein is the biggest matchmaking lie ever told.

That you don’t need to DO anything different, you just need to be setup with the best matches.

Whether a matchmaker tells it to you or you tell it to yourself this belief will cripple your chances in love.

You always need to do something different.

The answer always involves you changing something about…..

-how you communicate

-how you present yourself or your looks

-how you act when you like someone

-what you say and do on a first date

-your intentions on dates 1-5

-your beliefs or emotions

-your dating strategy

-how you decide who is a good match for you

The reality is a matchmaker could set you up with the best matches in the world, but if you don’t have these other aspects working for you instead of against you it won’t matter.

Maybe you aren’t meeting the right types of men either, but that’s just one aspect of finding love.  All these other parts matter just as much.

The good news is we can teach you our simple system to meet the right types of men and how to be your best self so that you ultimately end up with the right guy for you.


If you are ready to get out of the dating game once and for all, then NOW IS THE TIME to fill out an application for a FREE Attract The Man You Want Personalized Blueprint with us.

Apply NOW and If we are 100% CERTAIN we can help you based on your application, we will reach out to you to create your personalized blueprint for Attracting the Man You Want!

Go here to apply:

Say yes to love,

Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael Arn