Find Him | Attract Him | Become Soul Mates for Life

Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael

Unbeatable Mindset/Emotional Fitness

Finding someone who is right for you long term is EXTREMELY important if you want a great long term relationship.

Incompatibility is a cause of many relationship problems. But finding the right person to love is just the ticket to the next level of conscious effort and work. Once you’ve found the right person to love, you need to learn the skills to love that person for a lifetime. The skills to love someone and create a great long term partnership are difficult to master. They require painful self-awareness and uncomfortable looks into the mirror of your own choices, emotions…
Time Management and Productivity in Dating

Time Management and Productivity in Dating

Does time management matter in dating? Can you be productive when it comes to your love life? The answer is YES! What you spend your precious time and energy DOING in your love life is crucial. There are specific actions you can take that have huge return on time investments in dating. These actions lead you to attract and connect with the right people. They directly lead you to creating a lasting relationship. Conversely, most things you CAN do in…
How to Be Confident in Dating

How to Be Confident in Dating

Your self-esteem and confidence are important to attracting the right person into your life. No matter what tactics you are using to meet people in dating, your confidence and self-esteem are constantly in the background influencing how you interact with people. Learning how to be more confident and even build more confidence will significantly improve your interactions with men and will lead you to ATTRACT more high quality men. How to be Confident in Dating –Set the frame-assume that whoever…

She Used to Believe it COULDN’T Happen for Her… Then it Did!

We just got this message from a client who USED to believe this couldn’t happen for her. We are so excited for her and my ❤️ is full! This is what happens when you take committed action, take different actions then before and follow a step-by-step system.   FIND & ATTRACT Your IDEAL MAN in the SHORTEST TIME possible by following a simple system that’s led thousands of modern, professional women to build lasting relationships with their ideal man. If you are…
Starting Over – 5 Minute Mindfulness and Meditation

Starting Over – 5 Minute Mindfulness and Meditation

Starting over each day and each moment is key in life.  Get a fresh start today by using the clear the calculator technique.  You don’t have to wait till tomorrow to start again or star over in life.  Now is the time. Usually when we think of starting over we think of it as some big Jerry Maguire moment where we completely separate ourselves from our old life and take drastic action. Starting over can happen each day.  It can…
Givers and Takers – Who Wins in Love and Life

Givers and Takers – Who Wins in Love and Life

I’ve been studying successful people from different time periods recently. Abraham Lincoln was a big giver in his orientation toward others. Many people initially thought this was a weakness of his. They underestimated him as a result, however he consistently showed up as a giver and was extremely successful over the long haul as a result. It reminds me of this quote by Chip Conley “Being a giver is not good for a 100-yard dash, but it’s valuable in a…

The Problem with Striving for Non-Stop Joy and Ease

We’ve been seeing A LOT of social media posts, videos and articles from “gooroos” lately talking about how you NEED to experience never ending JOY and EASE in your life. The message is that if it doesn’t feel easy.. If you aren’t JOYFUL all the time while living then you are not doing it right. There is something wrong in your approach. If you aren’t experiencing complete joy and ease with your partner there is something wrong. And that message…

How one woman found love online with a guy she previously would’ve rejected.

We are so happy for one of our clients.  She took responsibility for her results in love.  She reached out to work with us. She committed to doing things differently.  She put in the hard work. She made some significant changes in a very short amount of time. She has fallen in love with an amazing guy who is perfect for HER. Here is the message she just sent to us….. BRAVO! We couldn’t be happier for you and you…

THE BIGGER FOOL THEORY IN ACTION according to a “Reader” of ours.

We recently received a message from someone on facebook. She had some strong opinions about what we do and the people we work with. We love hearing ALL opinions. This person’s message helps us clear up some faulty assumptions about who we help and what we do. Thanks for giving us this opportunity. 1. Yes, if you want different results in your life, YOU will need to do something different.  YOU will have to make a change if you want things…

The deeper I get into the important areas of my life, the more satisfaction and success I get out of consistently doing the fundamental basics day in and day out.

I’m no longer chasing cool or sexy “new” things. I’m simply showing up everyday and getting better at and taking more satisfaction in the important basic actions of being…… -a husband -a dad -a business owner -a friend -a Psychologist/change agent -a writer -a community member I’m loving taking more pride and satisfaction in what most would consider boring or would overlook as obvious (but don’t actually do). Dr. Michael Arn      

“WHO IS HELPING THE MEN GET THEIR ACTS TOGETHER?”

This is a question we received from a woman today. We answered: “There are many coaches and experts helping men. Many men are seeking this help. It’s a huge million dollar industry. We happen to specialize in working with women. Have a great day.” The sad part to us is that she is asking a question that dis-empowers her. It takes her away from her own success. It focuses her on something she can’t control. With our clients, one of…
Online Dating Advice – How to Deal with Douches, Pervs, and Flakes

Online Dating Advice – How to Deal with Douches, Pervs, and Flakes

Today let’s get down to some real online dating advice. Certain aspects of online dating are maddening. Dealing with all the douche’s, pervs, players, haters and flakes out there is enough to make you want to become a nun and commit your life to ANYTHING other than a member of the male species. You know what we’re talking about. Those douchey or pervy messages you get from guys. Crudely commenting on how you look. Messaging you… “let’s f##k” as their…

Attraction and Chemistry are a lot like Motivation.

Most people wait and depend on someone or something outside of themselves to give them motivation or attraction.   That’s why motivation and attraction rarely happen and are short lived when they do occur.   Yes, some of attraction is innate and totally outside of our control.   Yet, much of attraction and chemistry for someone else starts within you.   The energy, boldness and playfulness you bring to an interaction with someone is huge.   The parts of you…
The “It probably works, but not for me” strategy.

The “It probably works, but not for me” strategy.

If you want to be one of the world’s foremost experts in unhappiness and loneliness we have a great strategy for you. Sure, there are many unhappy people out there, but with dedicated practice you can learn to surpass most other people’s unhappiness. First, identify the best practices out there in terms of how to find love and how to be happy. Discover what the happiest and most in love people have done to get there. Take each one of these…
What frame of Meaning are You Using?

What frame of Meaning are You Using?

Our 5-year-old son, Mason, asked me what it means when you hear sirens from firetrucks and the ambulance. I told him it means there are brave and courageous men and women going to help someone. The sirens are an affirmation that there are helpers out there at all times. That’s the frame of meaning I choose to believe and choose to convey to Mason. You could put a different frame of meaning on it. It could mean that someone is…

Approach Your Love Life as a Series of Sprints

We were talking with our workshop clients today about the importance of approaching dating & relationships as a SERIES OF SPRINTS.   You want to SPRINT (work hard, go on dates, interact with people on a dating site or app etc.) and take a break.   Sprint and take a break.   Sprint and take a break.   Go all out for a period of time. Invest a lot of your time and energy into finding the right person. Sprint…
“I’m not able to give you what I think you’re looking for”

“I’m not able to give you what I think you’re looking for”

Those were the words that changed our client’s life. We just got off the phone with a client who is in an exclusive relationship with an amazing guy. We are so proud of her. She told us that she decided to work with us after hearing those words. Her boyfriend told her those exact words. It was the second time in her life where she thought things were going well, only to find out her boyfriend wasn’t ready for a…
How to stop Falling in Love with the Wrong Men

How to stop Falling in Love with the Wrong Men

Getting dumped when you’re in love with someone is the worst. Realizing that the person you have the feelz for is totally wrong for you is excruciating. We know how hard it is to choose the right person to love. Many of you have asked us how you can stop falling for guys so quickly. How you can stop falling for the wrong guys over and over again. We teach our clients a specific dating process for how they can…
Top 4 Reasons Why Men Pull Away

Top 4 Reasons Why Men Pull Away

Discover why men pull away after getting close.  Why do men disappear after things seemed to be going well?  We’ll answer these questions for you once and for all. It really hurts when a guy you’re dating just disappears. You have a great date and you never hear from him again. You have a great first few months only to have him ghost on you. Or Maybe you have some flirty and fun messages back and forth online or on…
Is Comfort Holding You Back from Love?

Is Comfort Holding You Back from Love?

Often what’s OKAY, GOOD or COMFORTABLE is the main obstacle to your ultimate fulfillment in love. Comfort and Okayness are dream killers. They seduce you into complacency. They cause you to retreat back to old habits that are comfortable yet hold you back when you hit a big challenge. They stop you from taking the emotionally hard actions that lead to experiencing the kind of relationship you want and deserve. Our clients have that “hell no” moment. That moment when…
Why don’t MEN change?

Why don’t MEN change?

We receive A LOT of messages and comments wondering why women have to change…. Why don’t men change? Why don’t you teach guys how to be better men? Here are a few of the messages we’ve received recently…..; “So the only way they are going to help anyone is if they start re-educating men! Teach them how to be DECENT Human Beings. That’s the problem. That is why over half of the female population is single. Women choose to be…

Breaking free of the bread crumbers…..

We got off the phone with a client who finally broke her main forever single dating pattern. She had been dating bread crumbers for a LONG time. For the past two years she had dated a guy on and off who bread crumbed her the whole time. She had given her blood, sweat and tears to this guy and got very little in return. She was showing up day after day for this guy. Meeting his needs. Stepping up to…
Who are you NOT dating anymore?

Who are you NOT dating anymore?

We work with many clients in our live workshop and in our ongoing mentorship program. One of the first things we do with them is get CRYSTAL clear about who they won’t be dating anymore. Yes it’s important to know WHO is right for you. In the beginning it’s more important to know who you WON’T date from this day forward. Notice, we didn’t way wrong for you. Many of us continue to date people who are wrong for us.…
Can’t stop the Perfection….

Can’t stop the Perfection….

In our household the theme song from Troll’s plays a lot right now. Our son Mason is a huge fan. Can’t stop the feeling…… Can’t stop the feeling….. We usually have it stuck in our heads. Most of us have another song stuck in our heads day in and day out. It’ called… Can’t stop the perfection…. We play it all day – everyday. We strive to be perfect. In every area of our lives. We NEED to have the…
You can’t be successful in love without this one thing!

You can’t be successful in love without this one thing!

Most of our clients initially come to us for dating and relationship strategies. They know we’ve created a proven system for finding love with the right person and they want to KNOW the tactics we teach. People focus on tips and tactics. You want to know how to flirt. Where to find the right person. What site or app to use. What to say. Same with dieting.  We want to know the latest tactic or strategy for losing weight. Most…
Don’t buy another dating book

Don’t buy another dating book

You don’t need to buy ANOTHER dating book or read ANOTHER article on love. More information is hurting your chances in love. You don’t need more information. You don’t need to learn THE LATEST sexy new tactic to “attract your man”. More information keeps you stuck. It frustrates you. It zaps your time and energy. It keeps you in your head thinking over and over again. It murders your genuine connection with men. What sabotages your success in love are…
What are the root causes of the Forever Single Dating Patterns?

What are the root causes of the Forever Single Dating Patterns?

Sarah came to us in a sweat of panic and debilitating confusion. She knew she was stuck… She was trapped in several of the forever single dating patterns… She was excruciatingly aware that she was meeting guys who weren’t right for her. She kept dating these guys who seemed right but were breadcrumbing her. She was also meeting a gang of guys who were WAY off from what she was looking for. She KNEW there was better guys out there… Several…