Find Him | Attract Him | Become Soul Mates for Life

Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael

Online Dating Advice

“How can I be what he wants?”

A single, beautiful, successful woman asked us “How can I be what he wants?” and here was our answer… You could easily follow the random tips and strategies out there to turn yourself into what the media says that a man wants.….. Lose weight Try more night cream Become a siren (what does that mean?) Change your hair Change your face Don’t talk about what you want when you meet a man Buy a push up bra Don’t call a…

“I rejected the WRONG guy!”

“I rejected the WRONG guy!” Yesterday we were on a live call with our awesome, kick a$$, women’s group. One of our clients was excited to share a win. Every week, sharing wins is an important part of this call. Think about it for a second…. What place do you have in your life where you can brag and give yourself props for the actions you are taking in any area of your life? For most of us, we don’t…
Finding Your Soul Mate – Why is it so easy for everyone else?

Finding Your Soul Mate – Why is it so easy for everyone else?

Finding Your Soul Mate isn’t easy.  At least not for you.  It seems like it’s easy for everyone else. Do you notice how easy it is for your friends and co-workers to get into a relationship. Half the time they aren’t even trying.  It just happens. One minute they’re single and the next minute they’re on their way to walking down the aisle. If you go on facebook you see people connecting and finding love all the time. When we…

Are you Trying TOO Many things in Dating?

I was playing basketball with our son Mason yesterday. We were shooting hoops and I felt like I couldn’t miss. I kept shooting and it kept going in. It was a really good feeling.   As I thought about it, I realized that for the past several years I had settled on shooting a basketball with a certain form. I chose a particular way to shoot the ball and stuck with it.   Every time I played basketball I shot…
Dating Advice – What is Your Plan?

Dating Advice – What is Your Plan?

The best dating advice we can give you is to have a plan. Most people don’t have a plan when it comes to their love life. We act weird in our love lives. We don’t plan anything. We don’t want to plan how to meet the right person. We don’t believe we need a plan. People have probably told you for years that “It’ll happen when it’s right.” But in what other area of our life do we use this…
How to Attract Men Who are Compatible with You and Up to Your Standards

How to Attract Men Who are Compatible with You and Up to Your Standards

Today you are going to learn how to attract men who are compatible with YOU. Do you feel like no matter what you do you aren’t attracting or dating men who are up to your standards? Compatibility is important to the success and fulfilment of a relationship. If you are consistently ending up dating people who are off from what you are looking for something needs to change. It doesn’t matter if they’re way off physically, intellectually, personality wise or…
Time Management and Productivity in Dating

Time Management and Productivity in Dating

Does time management matter in dating? Can you be productive when it comes to your love life? The answer is YES! What you spend your precious time and energy DOING in your love life is crucial. There are specific actions you can take that have huge return on time investments in dating. These actions lead you to attract and connect with the right people. They directly lead you to creating a lasting relationship. Conversely, most things you CAN do in…
First Impressions – How to Make a Good First Impression

First Impressions – How to Make a Good First Impression

First Impressions are make or break in dating. We tend to take the first 5 seconds to 5 minutes with someone and extrapolate our first impressions to stereotype them as a person. This is no bueno if you don’t know how to make a good first impression. It’s no sweat if you can make positive impressions right away. Think about the people you’ve met in dating. How many great first impressions have people made on you? We’re going to guess…
Attract the Man You Want in 5 Simple Steps

Attract the Man You Want in 5 Simple Steps

Every day, we see successful, intelligent, amazing professional women go home ALONE at night.   During the day they mostly feel fine as they work through the hustle and bustle of their jobs.   But, the nights and weekends are the WORST.   They schedule themselves to the point of exhaustion to avoid thinking about how, when, or if they will ever have what they really want…a partner to share life with.   They wake up at 3 a.m FREAKING…

Is Online Dating a Problem?

Over the last few years, we’ve taught a small group of AMAZING women how to find and attract their ideal partner online. Once they knew… **WHERE to find him. **HOW TO authentically present themselves. **and WHAT to communicate to transition to a REAL date while screening out the catfishers. They were able to TAKE CONTROL of their dating life instead of feeling like it may never happen for them. For most people, online dating is a black hole of time…
Moving on After Divorce- LOVE LIVES OF THE REAL & NON-FAMOUS #63

Moving on After Divorce- LOVE LIVES OF THE REAL & NON-FAMOUS #63

  Moving on after divorce can be rough.  Some people stay stuck mentally or emotionally after their divorce for months, years or even decades.  Divorce recovery doesn’t just take time, it also takes specific actions on your part. In this episode we talk with a woman from Virginia who is a single mom and is dating.  She has been divorced about 6 years. In Love Lives of the REAL & NON-FAMOUS we have conversations with REAL people about their love lives. We…

How one woman found love online with a guy she previously would’ve rejected.

We are so happy for one of our clients.  She took responsibility for her results in love.  She reached out to work with us. She committed to doing things differently.  She put in the hard work. She made some significant changes in a very short amount of time. She has fallen in love with an amazing guy who is perfect for HER. Here is the message she just sent to us….. BRAVO! We couldn’t be happier for you and you…
Online Dating Advice – How to Deal with Douches, Pervs, and Flakes

Online Dating Advice – How to Deal with Douches, Pervs, and Flakes

Today let’s get down to some real online dating advice. Certain aspects of online dating are maddening. Dealing with all the douche’s, pervs, players, haters and flakes out there is enough to make you want to become a nun and commit your life to ANYTHING other than a member of the male species. You know what we’re talking about. Those douchey or pervy messages you get from guys. Crudely commenting on how you look. Messaging you… “let’s f##k” as their…
Does Match.com Work?

Does Match.com Work?

One of the biggest questions we get asked is “which Dating site or app should I use?” The bad news is there is no holy grail of dating sites or apps. There isn’t ONE that beats all the rest. Dating sites are like diets. There are many out there and the best one for you is the one you’ll use and stick to using. Today we talk about Match.com. Should you use Match.com? How do you use Match.com to actually…
How Megan Stopped Dating the Wrong Guys Over and Over

How Megan Stopped Dating the Wrong Guys Over and Over

Megan was 34. She had a graduate degree and a great career. She was attractive, fit and smart. She had a full life. Yet she kept dating the wrong men. Sure, men were pursuing her, but all these guys were way off from what she was looking for…. OR She was into a guy, only to have him leave her after things seemed to be going great. She was stuck in a repeating cycle of wrong guy after wrong guy.…
4 Online Dating Tips for Women

4 Online Dating Tips for Women

In the latest Date to Soul Mate Show we talk about 4 steps to successfully find the right person online. Online dating can be a complete time and energy wasting rabbit hole. We also have many clients who find love online after years of dating the wrong people. If you focus on these 4 steps you put yourself in a much better position to find the right person for you online. APPLY FOR A FREE ATTRACT THE MAN YOU WANT…
Have Him Pursue You

Have Him Pursue You

Let’s get together sometime! Let’s meet up soon. We’ll figure it out. I’ll hit you up sometime. One of the worst things in dating is when a person is SOMETIMING you. When they’re SOONING you. Even worse is when they expect you to do ALL the work. Let me know when you’re free! Let me know when you want to get together again. If you want to be the person in charge of making all the plans and giving all…

SAY THIS, NOT THAT in Dating & Relationships….

There is the end of the conversation when you want someone to take your phone number and call or text you. What do we normally do? Usually we say nothing and miss out on ever talking to that person again. or we say “here’s my number give me a call” or “give me your number” Next time SAY THIS: “I have to go, it was great talking to you.” followed by…… 1. You seem fun! Feel free to shoot me…
Top 4 Reasons Why Men Disappear or Ghost

Top 4 Reasons Why Men Disappear or Ghost

It really hurts when a guy you’re dating just disappears. You have a great date and you never hear from him again. You have a great first few months only to have him ghost on you. Or Maybe you have some flirty and fun messages back and forth online or on an app only to have him stop responding. Having a guy suddenly disappear or ghost with no explanation is one of the most confusing and upsetting parts of dating.…
Why don’t MEN change?

Why don’t MEN change?

We receive A LOT of messages and comments wondering why women have to change…. Why don’t men change? Why don’t you teach guys how to be better men? Here are a few of the messages we’ve received recently…..; “So the only way they are going to help anyone is if they start re-educating men! Teach them how to be DECENT Human Beings. That’s the problem. That is why over half of the female population is single. Women choose to be…
She’s getting married in November

She’s getting married in November

It’s celebration time. Our client Angela is getting married in November to a MAN that she’s been dreaming of for a long time. For many years it seemed like he might just be that. A dream. A dream that never turns into reality. For a long time, Angela felt successful in other areas of her life, but kept dating guys who wouldn’t open up to her, didn’t feel right or wouldn’t commit. She couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t having…

The 1 rule to have in dating…

We don’t believe in “rules” when it comes to dating and love. Even that “rule” we believe in breaking from time to time. If you are dating it’s important to set one rule for yourself….. NEVER GIVE ANYONE MONEY THAT YOU’RE DATING! Don’t do it. Not for any reason. Not for any “story” they have. There are criminal networks out there obsessing over ways to prey on someone feeling lonely and extracting as much money from you as they can.…
Are you making choices from your feelings or your system?

Are you making choices from your feelings or your system?

If you want to break out of dating the wrong guys over and over again you need a system. If you want to stop searching endless profiles online of guys you don’t like you need a system. To do anything great long term you need a system. Whether it’s your health, physical fitness, your career or having great relationships with others you need a system for long term success. Most of people don’t have a system when it comes to dating.…
she was scared to get new photos

she was scared to get new photos

One of our clients just got new photos done for online dating. and it will make a huge difference in WHO she is attracting online. We are so excited for her, because we know the difference it WILL make. She had fears around getting new photos. Most of us do. We feel vulnerable and out of our comfort zone getting photos done. We make all kinds of excuses why we don’t get photos. “guys should like me just for me”…
Do you really need chemistry with a guy?

Do you really need chemistry with a guy?

He’s soooo nice, BUT I’m not into him! He’s a great guy, BUT I don’t feel any chemistry! He wants to be with me, BUT I’m not attracted to him! Many of the clients we work with come to us initially having zero chemistry with the men their “SUPPOSED” to like and having a lot of chemistry with emotionally unavailable men. Their frustrated that they aren’t attracted to these NICE and GOOD guys. The questions is… Do you really need…
Music, wine and your packaging

Music, wine and your packaging

Last Friday and Saturday we went to a local concert here in Sonoma, CA called Huichica. The whole shindig is held at a cool winery called Gundlach Bunschu or Gunbun as the locals like to call it. So it was a weekend full of music, wine and great food. It was also a great place to do some people watching… As you know, we are psychologists so we love people watching. One of the most interesting parts of people watching…
Don’t buy another dating book

Don’t buy another dating book

You don’t need to buy ANOTHER dating book or read ANOTHER article on love. More information is hurting your chances in love. You don’t need more information. You don’t need to learn THE LATEST sexy new tactic to “attract your man”. More information keeps you stuck. It frustrates you. It zaps your time and energy. It keeps you in your head thinking over and over again. It murders your genuine connection with men. What sabotages your success in love are…
You are only ONE green light signal or conversation away from finding the love of your life…..

You are only ONE green light signal or conversation away from finding the love of your life…..

You just don’t know which green light signal it will be! That’s right. One green light signal or one conversation with the RIGHT PERSON at the RIGHT TIME will change the course of your life. The problem is we don’t connect with each other anymore. We are more unapproachable than ever. We are stuck in our phones, stuck in our mental to do list, and running from one activity to another. We also have our walls up because we’ve been hurt…
Are you pen pals or are you ACTUALLY dating?

Are you pen pals or are you ACTUALLY dating?

There is a special kind of boiling frustration that engulfs you when a guy you met online continues to want to be message pals or text buddies. The dreaded never ending messages. He messages you over and over again. or He halfheartedly messages you every once in awhile. All without ever asking you out on a REAL DATE. The growing resentment inside of you explodes when he send you another “what’s up” message. The worst part of it is you…
What you want DOESN’T matter if you don’t figure this out first….

What you want DOESN’T matter if you don’t figure this out first….

We LOVE San Francisco. We love going there for weekend romantic getaways. In fact, our FAVORITE Italian restaurant in the whole world is there, Franchino’s. It’s the kind of restaurant where it feels like your mother is doing the cooking, only its a version of your mother that is an even better cook. (sshhhh don’t tell our mothers we said that) It’s run by an Italian family. The father is the host and runs the front end of the restaurant…