Givers and Takers – Who Wins in Love and Life

givers and takers

I’ve been studying successful people from different time periods recently.

Abraham Lincoln was a big giver in his orientation toward others. Many people initially thought this was a weakness of his. They underestimated him as a result, however he consistently showed up as a giver and was extremely successful over the long haul as a result.

It reminds me of this quote by Chip Conley

“Being a giver is not good for a 100-yard dash, but it’s valuable in a marathon”

Givers and Takers

In dating most people are in take mode. They are looking to take right up front. They’re immediately looking to GET desire, connection, validation, an ego boost etc. from someone.

People feel that. It pushes away the best people.

Taking is a short-term strategy in dating and it repeatedly leaves you feeling like you aren’t getting your needs met.

In dating you want to look to give first. Give energy. Give warmth. Give connection. Give desire.

Once you’re doing that we can talk about how to be a great receiver, because receiving is VERY different then taking.

Say yes to love,

Dr. Ashley & Dr. Michael Arn