How & When to Say I Love You for the First Time

It is SCARY to say I love you for the first time.

You have these intense feelings for someone.

You can’t even quite wrap your head around these feelings yet.

You’ve likely loved someone before only to have it NOT WORKOUT which has left you with some mental and emotional scare tissue.

You want to tell this person.

You don’t know if you should tell them.

Is this the right time to say I love you?

Will you look like a fool?

Will you seem desperate?

Does this person love you back?

Could saying I love you at the wrong time lead to this person walking away from you?

In today’s Date to Soul Mate Show we unpack how & when to say I love you for the first time.

We want to take away as much of the guesswork as we can for you.

say I love youitunesbooHow & When to Say I love You!

First, when you start to feel like you love someone, it’s time to sit with your thoughts and feelings for a day or two.

Ask yourself, why do I love this person?

Does it have to do with me?

Do I want to be with someone no matter who they are because I’m lonely?  Am I trying to fill something inside me?


Does it have to do with them and the pleasure of the time we’re spending together?

Do I know this person on a deep level and have I seen them in many different contexts?

Be mindful of these questions and your answers for a couple of days.

It’s great to say I love you if…

  • You’ve been mindful of your reasons and feelings for love and you want to express how you feel.
  • You’ve gotten to know this person on a deep level and in many different contexts – if you do it before this it’ll come across as desperate and insincere.
  • You understand that saying I love you is not saying you’re the one for me yet. It’s an expression of your feelings.
  • You know that being in love is a feeling and that a great long-term relationship requires a lot more than love.
  • You’ve been mindful about loving someone and aren’t just saying it due to attraction or sexual chemistry.
  • You are sober.
  • You take off the pressure for your partner – Don’t make it a big grand gesture or put too much pressure on the other person.
  • You can say it without attachment – Saying I love you is like giving a present.  It’s the moment of saying I love you or giving a present that counts.  It’s simply you expressing what’s true for you.  Whether or not the other person reciprocates or says I love you back is irrelevant at this point.
  • If someone doesn’t love you back it means they weren’t right for you, not that you shouldn’t have said I love you or that you should’ve done anything different.


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